Deehan's Pensieve

Sometimes I don't talk about how I feel, I often sing about it!
I have always loved Adele. Her voice is so powerful that it really summons real emotions.
I just love this song very much!
SOME lines are really true to how I feel now. <3 (not all the lines okay?haha)


Hiding My Heart Away Lyrics

This is how the story went I met someone by accident
| It was really sheer accident, I smile every time I am reminded of how it all started , really uncanny |

It blew me away, it blew me away
| Really, I was blown away!Kay nganung bright paman ka naku? Hahah | 
 
It was in the darkest of my days  
| Yeah, it was one of the darkest hour in my life because I was about to take an examination which I was so sure I won't do well |

When you took my sorrow and you took my pain 
| You were beyond entertaining,you were errrr ANNOYING I didn't like that you interrupted me while I was studying| 

And buried them away, you buried them away
| Yeah, you kept asking questions and I wondered why I answered them. Oh well, I'm not really rude you know. I won't roll my eyes in front of a stranger |

 
I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done  
| I wanted to get married to someone like you..someday..someday |

And wake up to your face against the morning sun 
| And see how both terrible and adorable you will look|

 But like everything I've ever known, you disappear one day  
| Yeah, you needed to disappear and I let you go because it was "heroic"|

So I spend my whole life hiding my heart away
| Yes, you're one of the reasons |
 
Drop me off at the train station  
| No, there's no train station.. bus nua |

Put a kiss on top of my head  
| Hahah , oh no | 

Watch me wave, you watched me wave
| Yes, I clearly remembered how forlorn was your face when I was about to leave.. how sweet | 
 
Then you went on home to your skyscrapers  
| Aw, aha dapit imung skycrapers?? Haha | 

Neon lights and waiting papers  
That you call home, you call it home
| You went home ..the home with them |
 
I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done 
And wake up to your face against the morning sun  
But like everything I've ever known, you disappear one day  
So I spend my whole life hiding my heart away
 
I woke up feeling heavy hearted  
| Especially on the day you tied the knot with her |

I'm going back to where I started   
| I was pretending to be very strong, I've been trying to |

The morning rain, the morning rain
| Baha badeng! Baha!!! | 
 
Although I wish that you were here  
| Do I need to still say that? |

That same old road that brought me here  
| I went to those places where we used to roam around...often ( REALLY OFTEN) thinking that I can see you everywhere |

Is calling me home, it's calling me home
| Then I realized how incredibly difficult it was for us. The timing was really very BAD! |
 
I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done  
And wake up to your face against the morning sun  
| Of course, I fancied getting married on the right time and doing things in God's perfect time |
 
But like everything I've ever known, you disappear one day 
| Yes, I allowed you to disappear and I am still not sure if it was right even if I think it was..again.."heroic". |
 
So I spend my whole life hiding my heart away 
| So, I busied myself with so many things in an attempt to get over it |
 
And I can spend my whole life hiding my heart away
| I disagree in this line of the song... I can't spend my whole life hiding my heart away. I am thankful I met you! I already know what kind of man I really want..it's someone like you!|


 

Oct 17, 2012
Wednesday
1:00 pm

This one looks like an infinity pool in Indonesia that I saw online. I wanted to really capture it's beauty and I hope I offered justice in this photo. :D

I've been here since I was young . I could still imagine how thrilled we were whenever my Father and Mother would decide to take a plunge here . \(*O*)/ I love cold springs because it's so hot here in the Philippines.

I tried to improve the first photo I took by trying to show some parts of the sky . I think this photo is better than the first one I took. What do you think?

This the second pool. There are four big pools in that resort.

This is my bff Lolie. She is my cousin's girlfriend.

What I love about this place is that I can enjoy seeing verdant scenes.It's really relaxing here.

Enjoying life <3

This is the first pool. So clean!

I wanted to bring this home but I can't. I can't steal them you know!Hahaha I wanted to!

Oh, so pretty!

This is me and my pretty Mom. We went to this resort after lunch. It was not really planned. All of a sudden we decided to go here and poooff we reached the place and took gazillion pictures. Haha! We enjoyed taking pictures. I love unplanned trips!

Visitors can rent these cottages for 2 to 3 dollars.

That big cottage is the biggest one they have. Weddings, birthdays and seminars are usually held there.

I took this on our way home. Oh! I love the serenity!

A typical countryside scene.

A pose with my bff Lolie. Our backdrop is the nearby corn field.(Oops I really didn't notice I was still bringing my towel.Hahah)

This one summons so many memories of my childhood... sweet memories I must say.

When I was young I wanted to have wings and fly. Now, I wanted to try flying without wings! I want to try sky-diving!

I see this everyday!

Banana plantations along the road and some people driving motorcycles (without helmets). Scary huh?

The corns I don't own. Hahah

I love sudden trips and I love savoring every moment of my youth.

Photos were taken inside my purple room. It was still so early in the morning and I don't really need to wear sunglasses outside .Hahaah I just tried to take photos of myself wearing my sunglasses (just checking if I look cool wearing it..haha).This was taken before I started traveling to my school.(Oct.13,2012)

 Hello! I finally finished my two examinations. Yes, only two. I was supposed to take three final examinations last Saturday but my Professor decided to move our Business Policy and Strategy exam on Oct. 20. Actually, I wanted all my examinations to end that day. I wanted to be free from the burden of studying so many things. However, I think God knows that I should study more so He moved my last exam to another date. Hahah! Well, at least ,I only have one exam to worry about. :D

My accounting examination went SOOOOOO fine! Hahaha... I answered the easy questions first . I was perplexed ,yes, but I was expecting the examination to be so difficult that I might not be able to answer many questions. Oh well, it was difficult but not as much as I expect it to be. I was soooooooo happy!!! I was actually the 4th one to finish the exam . Cheers! On that day, I also received my ratings for our oral defense during our Management Control System Forum and I got a 1.0 grade ( here in the Philippines, a 1.0 rating is the highest rating a Professor can give ). Cheers! Our paper received a 1.25 remark(another cheers!credits to my group-mate Christian Paul who really drafted the paper.Hugs Christian,you are really gifted!!  ). The weekly written analysis of the cases that we submitted as a group(which I am usually the only one making) also received mostly 1.0 remarks. How could I not be be VERY happy? Thanks to my God who gave me the energy and wisdom to finish the tasks. Accounting was never an easy subject for me. It was my great God who gave me all what I needed! Yeah, I got dark circles under my eyes and I was sleep deprived for several occasions but I am very happy that all my efforts paid off . Wow! How fulfilling!

For my Competitive Strategies in a Global Economy examination, I think the most difficult question was about how the Philippine government should deal with the conflict with China so that the Banana industry can survive. Oh, it was difficult!Generally, I am hopeful that my essay answers could satisfy my very smart Professor (fingers crossed :D).

For my last class, that's my 4pm -7pm class, our Professor decided to move the exam. Oh! I am hopeful I'll do well on this exam next Saturday. I'll give it my best and God will do the rest. \(*0*)/

I will miss my classmates T.T

I thank God for allowing me to meet amazing people. My perspective in life really improved because of them. God is really using different ways for me to learn well His lessons in life. I can really feel that the best is yet to come and I am very thrilled about what will happen to me. Yes, I have plans but I know God loves to surprise me. My plans might fail but I am confident God is just telling me that He has BETTER plans. I failed so many times and over the years I have developed a deep trust to Him because there were so many things that I thought was a "failure" and then later on I realized it was "a way" to realize God's better plans.

Yes, I was physically exhausted last Saturday but my heart was really filled with joy. Even though I arrived home so late and I woke up so early the next day ( I woke up 4 am on the next day because I have duties in the church) , I was reinvigorated by the idea that I am on my way into making my life really fruitful.

I am hopeful that I will only end up in something really very good. If it's not very good,then it's not the end. I am born victorious! Ganbatte Janie!

Photos taken last Sunday (Oct,14) after I went to church. Yes, I strive hard to improve my career but this not my priority. My priority is my spiritual life. After all, this place is not my "real" home. I am just a traveler here. My real home is the new Jerusalem.